As 2020 has shown, our world can be unpredictable. We may even lose our footing and balance from time to time. Our hope for a thriving and joyful future may even recede into the background.  

For some, the impact of challenging times is overwhelming. Recovery, if it comes at all, can be slow. Still, others show remarkable resilience and appear to move through challenging times with resolve, ease, and elegance.  

It is more important than ever to cultivate the strengths and resources inside ourselves and with others to live our lives in this “new normal.”   

Interruptions and disruptions come with living life. How we respond determines what we can control and the unfolding experience of the next moment.   

When unexpected events turn life upside down, it is the degree to which our resiliency comes into play that makes these “make-or-break” situations an opportunity for growth or utter defeat. 

The good news is that each of us can reshape ourselves and our lives after a disruption and achieve new levels of strength and meaningfulness. Though it’s easy to feel vulnerable amid chaos and uncertainty, life disruptions may also be our biggest opening for discovery and new actions.  

So how can you become more resilient? Here’s a look at seven key characteristics of people who demonstrate resilience during challenging times. 

A Sense of Hope and Trust  

Resilient people have a basic assumption based on the intrinsic good of life, and trust that things will turn out alright in the end. This positive attitude allows them to weather times when everything seems bleak, and to look for and accept support. This approach gives people the ability to strive for a better future for themselves, their families, organizations, and communities. 

Interpreting Experiences in a New Light 

The ability to look at a situation in a new way (a competency called “reframing”) can minimize the impact of a difficult situation. Becoming mindful observers, resilient people distinguish their interpretations from the facts and notice their thoughts and judgments with kindness and care.  

A Meaningful System of Support 

One of the best ways to live through a crisis is to request the support of other people who can listen and validate your brilliance. Knowing that others care and will come to your aid decreases the sense of isolation. Resilient people are not stoic loners. They know the value of expressing their fears and frustrations and receiving support or guidance from friends and family or a professional coach. 

A Sense of Mastery and Control Over Your Destiny 

Resilient people may not predict the future, but they know they have some say so in how the future unfolds. Resilient people know that, ultimately, their happiness and the integrity of their life values depend on their ability to take action rather than remain passive to circumstances outside of their control. Tough times call for us to tap into our own sense of personal responsibility and courage. 

Self-Reflection and Insight 

Life’s experiences provide fertile ground for learning. Asking questions that invite honest reflection can open the door to new understanding and appreciation of who we are and what we stand for. Giving voice to our thoughts and feelings leads to insight and helps transform a problem into something useful. Resilient people learn from life situations and do not succumb to punishing themselves because of decisions made in the past. 

Sense of Humor 

The ability to see the absurdity, irony or genuine humor in a situation stimulates our sense of hope and possibility. Humor has both psychological and physical benefits in relieving stress because it encourages a swift change in the perception of our circumstances— and when there is a perceptual shift, our mood follows. 

© 2020, Bettie J. Spruill